That's funny...here I thought Asriel was a girl this whole time.
[deleted N/A]

Last edited by Thora (2010 April 04, 3:08 pm)

Thora wrote:

That's funny...here I thought Asriel was a girl this whole time.

Well now, what ever gave you that idea?

I guess I never realized the similarities between "Asriel" and "Ariel"

I took Asriel from "Lord Asriel" from "His Dark Materials" (book series) years ago. Because he reminded me of General Baal from "Grandia" (videogame).
Since then, I've just held onto the name...

Thora wrote:

mezbup wrote:

Women don't realise they get dumped a lot for bringing this up too early.

newsflash - men do it too.

I've never known a western (or Japanese) man to do that, but it's apparently very common with Chinese men. Many Chinese guys I know have their social networking/IM profile pic as some random baby (of no relation), in an attempt to lure in women. It's kind of creepy. Then again, so is ナンパ.

Guys don't need to get scared off by women bringing up kids and marriage early. My girlfriend said she wanted to marry me during the first week we were dating (and she was only 19). You just have to talk about it to make sure you're on the same page and have the same expectations. She wants to marry me, but not RIGHT NOW - just one day.

My ex, on the other hand, wanted kids ASAP and wouldn't take no for an answer, financial & career situation be damned. That was when it was time to end it.

Last edited by Jarvik7 (2010 April 04, 12:09 am)

Thora wrote:

newsflash - men do it too.  Sometimes as part of a sinister seduction plot, sometimes because the initial infatuation period is just that intoxicating, and sometimes because they're at that stage.  And sometimes women toss it out to make the man feel desired - safe in the knowledge he won't take her up on it. And some men like that feeling. And... 

sigh

I'm absolutely terrible about jumping into something on fire, then growing emotionally distant and cold as months and/or years pass...And I've also been on the other side of the exact same.  Making friends-check, Getting dates-check, Letting the chemistry allow the situation to progress naturally-check, Staying emotionally intimate for the long haul-eh...not so good.

lol I'm not convinced at all that we're wired for it anymore... I think serial monogamy may be as good as it gets

thegeelonghellswan wrote:

kendo99 wrote:

Look, I wouldn't get myself into a situation like that.  But, I did do stupid stuff when I was younger and sometimes you have to go into save-your-ass mode.  In the long run, more damage is done if he loses his job, than if she changes Eikawa's and gets dumped. I don't feel particularly sympathetic for him, but I also know that people make really stupid mistakes, get into dangerous relationships, and need to get out of them while minimizing damage.
My suggestion may seem bastardly, but really, the bastard deed was taking this girl to bed to begin with when he wasn't at all on the same wavelength as her.  And that's ok.  We learn from our stupid mistakes, it is how we form genuine relationships when we are older.

I wasn't calling you a bastard, I think your advice is bad, but the TS is the bastard, and he probably isn't a bastard, that's just me being harsh.

Weasling your way out of something isn't a learning experience. Man-ing up and copping the fall out is a learning experience IMO.

To be honest from a self interest perspective, I have no qualms about being dishonest to get out of an uncomfortable situation, some people are illogical and if you cant explain to them that it is too quick to talk about marriage and children on the first date, or first night *******, then honestly, do what you can do and get out of the situation. I know the women in the room might say oh what a bastard yonosa is, but the fact is look on women's forums over the internet, their advice for fellow women is usually rather sadistic when it  comes to relationships.  Sadistic is bit strong maybe but go read that stuff and you'll get the idea. Women tend to relate to each other over a man when it comes to looking at relationships, which is understandable and since most of them don't have experience dating women, they can't really relate imo. Just like I can't relate to dating men.

Last edited by Yonosa (2010 April 04, 1:41 am)

Did you at least try to be honest with her? Maybe you're the one with the real emotional issues seeing as you need to lie to her? A little honesty goes a long way here.

And yeah, when the hell did RTK become dating advice for men?

Full Disclosure: Married three times with over a hundred relationships. Taking advice from me is dangerous.

Last edited by Nukemarine (2010 April 04, 2:11 am)

Nice, pasting her message here for us. We can see how your alleged student-lover's alleged comment, with its imperfect English, really contributes to the creepiness. My sympathy for you has really gone up. Those Asian Women™!

Is this one of the Japanese girls you wanted to date as part of your immersion philosophy? Maybe you can use the same strategy with her as you did when you wanted advice on how not to pay your overdue phone bill.

Last edited by nest0r (2010 April 04, 3:23 am)

First a thread about dating women and now about dumping them, is there no taboo on this forum? :>

Seriously if you ask about relationshits advice on the internets it generally means you're pretty far on insane scale yourself.

Fake your own death, then go back to work posing as your twin brother.

Guaranteed to work.

lol dude, you built up enough courage to say you're into S&M yet you couldn't simply say "sorry I don't like you". You'd better learn how to say sorry I don't like you otherwise bitches be attaching themselves to yo ass.

I was in a similar situation, but mine wasn't as 'crazy'. I wanted to break it off asap, so I told her that I didn't like her she was upset, but big woop. It wasn't easy, it was probably harder than telling a girl you do like her (something which I still haven't done) but you feel better when you do it because there won't be shit left on the stick, and you'll have clear conscience after it all.

Just imagine one day you're with the girl you actually like in a nice quiet restaurant playing nice jazz music, then you bump into the ex-girl you used for sex, she's pissed off from another break up. She then gets up and says "HEY EVERYONE, HE IS INTO S&M, AND HIS BALLSACKS ARE WEAK". You're gf will either be disgusted (or even more turned on) but in either case you'll have to clean that shit up. So yeah, never leave shit down to be cleaned up for later. Clean it while you can, otherwise it dries, stains, and becomes even harder to get off.

And edit to her response: Looks like you got yourself into some deep shit. 

be strong yo~

Last edited by liosama (2010 April 04, 6:22 am)

kendo99 whilst your initial posts were a knee-jerk reaction they weren't that bad, it was just a slightly devious solution to the perceived problem.

I also don't think the OP is a bad person, he's just got in over his head and doesn't have the empathy to realise that the situation really isn't that bad at all.

@OP you should take the advice of the only girl to post a reply, Thora. Her advice is by far the most straightforward way to handle this. You are an adult, and you should get used to the idea that you are responsible for your actions. You can resolve this amicably. To be honest there's nothing creepy about the way she's acted. She's a student and can be expected to be emotionally naive, you should know better.