Yup, he pretty much just answered everything.

Every region in Japan is famous for something, and it's usually that something that people buy as presents when they go to said place (for example, I tend to buy Akabeko for people I visit outside of Fukushima). So just get something inexpensive that your locality is known for.

well, you could always convert her into the catholic faith.  That's a "local gift," and who would argue that salvation isn't the best gift EVER? edit2: you say Rome isn't famous for anything can be bought, but...isn't the Catholic church selling indulgences again?...

lol, just kidding...

But, seriously, I got my host sister some homemade sesame street finger puppet things from my hometown when I stayed with them in Japan.  When I stayed with them, they gave me two things that would remind me of my stay with them:
1) the chopsticks I used everyday when I was w/ them--an amazing gift.
2) a cd of this song (okaeri I'm home...) that we heard like 1000 times everywhere we went in Japan.  Lame, but that song brings back memories.

So you should give something that will remind her of her stay.

edit: she'll probably be like "oh, no!  don't get me anything!"--but it's sort of expected that you do get her something.

Last edited by igordesu (2009 March 18, 1:16 pm)

No, I just wanted to know if it's out of place for them. Anyway, the "welcome present" point of view does the job for me, so I'll get her something.
Actually I'm atheist so I'm not really interested in buying those religious things, but I'll definitely find something. I wasn't worried about what to buy, anyway.
Thanks for the feedback!

Alright, here's another gift query:

I have a friend who was studying in America (Japanese) this year. She came to my house to stay multiple times, for both Thanksgiving and Christmas. So now when I go study in Japan in 2 weeks, she really wants me to come and stay at her house for some time. She lives with only her mom. So the question is, what do I bring for her mom? I am from New York, and she has brought my parents some really nice bowls from Japan. So I assume I need something equally as nice, right?

Often when a gift is given, a somewhat lesser gift is given in return - which could also be reciprocated. Otherwise the gift-giving would escalate and continue ad infinitum, resulting in M.A.D. (Mutually Assured Debt). 

As mentioned, sweets and locally famous items are typical.  But I agree that a gift that lasts would be great.  Italian leather coin-purse?

Of course, in Rome, her best gifts will be memories...  take lots of photos the first week and make a simple album for her.

If I recall correctly, better to not wrap any gifts in white - the color is associated with death & funerals.

I disagree. I wouldn't give her anything. The reason she's giving you a gift is because she will be indebted to you during her time in your country. She will ask you for help and giving a gift is the appropriate way for her to say これからお世話になりますので、宜しくお願いします。

If you give her a gift then it tilts the scales back onto her and she'll feel awkward. It will definitely mean that you get a gift if you meet her in Japan.

I'd be nice and help her out and leave it at that. I'd also introduce her to local food and culture but don't make it feel like a gift, make it feel like hospitality.

That's my advice anyway. If you go to Japan, that's when you should take a gift with you.

wrightak,
I was thinking something along those lines, and that's why I opened this topic. I seems however that it's a matter of "international" common sense, rather than a Japanese custom.
Perhaps the best thing for me to do is find something that will be useful to her in her stay (like the one phauna suggested, for example), that can be considered a "welcome gift". But it must be something small.
Challenging!

wrightak wrote:

Having said the above, it's probably good to give her something when she leaves, as a souvenir. The Japanese are all about their omiyages.

Speaking of the word おみやげ, I was talking to my Japanese friend last night questioning her what I should get for her mother, and after I said the word おみやげ she said I sounded like I was 3 years old and said that おみやげ is really kid-like speech. Has anyone else encountered this?

Yeah, maybe it just evolved. Well, I'll see my friend tomorrow, so I'll ask for some more clarification and post my findings here.

Could have been the context I was using it in, asking what kind of souvenir I should bring. But yeah, that's what she said. Struck me as odd too since our teachers always told us that word. But then again, one of those (native speaking) teachers tried to argue that 雰囲気 is NEVER pronounced ふいんき  >_>

Ryuujin27 wrote:

wrightak wrote:

Having said the above, it's probably good to give her something when she leaves, as a souvenir. The Japanese are all about their omiyages.

Speaking of the word おみやげ, I was talking to my Japanese friend last night questioning her what I should get for her mother, and after I said the word おみやげ she said I sounded like I was 3 years old and said that おみやげ is really kid-like speech. Has anyone else encountered this?

Yes, I have heard this, too.  Amongst city-dwellers and younger people, the only time they seem to use おみやげ is for souvenirs brought home from a trip.  プレゼント seems to be much more popular for presents, in general.

You can always ask this question on http://www.lang-8.com and get a sampled response from native Japanese.