How to be less shy when talking to Japanese People

somstuff Member

Registered: 2012-06-18 Posts: 65

So I finally made some Japanese friends, but I'm pretty shy when I talk to them, mainly because I suck at speaking and, to a lesser extent, listening (but that can be improved on my own). Anyone have tips for improving conversation skills?

I guess "just doing it" is the obvious answer, but is there anything more specific?

ryuudou Member

Registered: 2009-03-05 Posts: 406

I think this topic would be more appropriately named "How to be less shy" or "How to be less shy when talking to people", as Japanese people aren't any different. In general just work on talking to people more, and once you're comfortable being outgoing it won't matter who you're specifically talking to. It's the kind of experience that self-sustains itself; try social activities and get used to talking to people. There is no secret solution. Start on Skype if it's that crippling, and then gradually work your way up. Don't be scared of people thinking that your speaking ability sucks.

Language ability is something that will take care of itself as long as you keep practicing, though from the way you worded your post it implies you have the language ability but not the speaking ability. You can be not-shy and not able to express yourself, however I think your issue is more of that you're shy then that you can't express yourself.

Last edited by ryuudou (2012 November 06, 3:45 am)

nadiatims Member

Registered: 2008-01-10 Posts: 1676

if you're shy because you're afraid of sounding awkward or accidentally offending someone, just realise that pretty much anything dumb you say is likely to be tolerated as learner mistakes.

Also don't feel intimidated because they have the linguistic upper-hand. Just because they can speak orders of magnitude more fluently than you doesn't necessarily mean they are more intelligent/funny/etc, so there's really no reason to be any more shy than you would be around non japanese people.

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Jarvik7 Member

From: 名古屋 Registered: 2007-03-05 Posts: 3946

Alcohol

chamcham Member

Registered: 2005-11-11 Posts: 1444

Go to Youtube and watch foreigners speaking japanese to their friends.
A lot of it will be awful and you'll realize there's nothing to worry about.

Oniichan Member

From: 名古屋 Registered: 2009-02-02 Posts: 269

Jarvik7 wrote:
Alcohol

+1

Though I prefer to avoid the place these days, "language exchange" at the HUB did wonders for my conversation abilities.

Jarvik7 Member

From: 名古屋 Registered: 2007-03-05 Posts: 3946

Yeah I kind of hate the HUB now (and their poorly mixed drinks), but I still end up getting dragged down to the Sakae one once a month or so.

It's a pretty fun place if you're single though.

Last edited by Jarvik7 (2012 November 07, 1:47 am)

Tzadeck Member

From: Kinki Registered: 2009-02-21 Posts: 2484

Jarvik7 wrote:
Yeah I kind of hate the HUB now (and their poorly mixed drinks).

I'm not a HUB guy myself, but one great thing, at least about the Kyoto HUB near Sanjo, is that good whiskey is super cheap. I think Bowmore 12 year is like 630 yen? And the also-very-good Laphroig 10 year is about the same. Go with the Bowmore, straight, with water on the side. That's a damn good price for a damn fine whiskey.

Last edited by Tzadeck (2012 November 07, 3:37 am)

AlexandreC Member

From: Canada Registered: 2008-09-26 Posts: 309

Self-talk

http://tiny.cc/mac57

Daichi Member

From: Washington Registered: 2009-02-04 Posts: 450

What about training yourself on public speaking in general? How about finding a local Toastmasters group and participating each week?

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Jarvik7 wrote:

Jarvik7 wrote: