http://www.cracked.com/article_19363_6-r...k-out.html

As a regular lurker of this board, my first thought on reading this article was to see what you guys thought of it. He makes some good points, but most of the problems seem to boil down to unrealistic expectations or not knowing what you're getting into. It's somewhat discouraging to read, but at the end I felt like my expectations and motivations hold up pretty well. Except culture shock. I guess I can't really predict how that will go.

Anyway, your thoughts?

I think it's pretty spot on, putting aside the usual exaggeration of Cracked's satiric writing.

Culture shock, in particular, is something people very easily overlook. I've seen a lot of people who assume that culture shock is something that only happens to ignorant people and that can be prepared for in advance, but that's not really true.

Pretty much on spot

yudantaiteki Wrote:... putting aside the usual exaggeration of Cracked's satiric writing.

This doesn't leave much left in the article except some vague sentiments. ^_^

I feel more comfortable in Japan than my home country - the hard part is finding a job.

Your mileage may vary

dizmox Wrote:I feel more comfortable in Japan than my home country - the hard part is finding a job.

Why? how?? I'm genuinely curious why?

You've probably only visited Japan on holiday; you realise living there day to day will be significantly different experience?

Interestingly, alot of my Japanese friends in London say they're more comfortable living in Europe, but mostly that comes to less social (and parental) pressure on finding a good job, and less rigid protocols when it comes to friendships and dating.

I'm curious why anyone would find the opposite true.

Japanese people often long for the west (憧れる) because for them it's an escape from social pressure. As foreigners, we do not have those social pressures placed upon us in Japan (though there are other stresses that come from being an outsider/visible minority/not adult-level fluent).

That cracked article is awesome though. Too many people have expectations of foreign country X being a wonderland that will solve all of their problems.

aphasiac Wrote:

dizmox Wrote:I feel more comfortable in Japan than my home country - the hard part is finding a job.

Why? how?? I'm genuinely curious why?

I prefer the atmosphere and people's personalities in general. People are just wayyy easier to get on with and we generally have more in common. Plus I feel more comfortable being open in a foreign language than my own. Plus the food here sucks and the trains are always running behind schedule.

I'm out of touch with English culture as it is anyway - I don't keep up with western music, TV, etc.. so I never know what to talk about with people here.

Jarvik7 Wrote:That cracked article is awesome though. Too many people have expectations of foreign country X being a wonderland that will solve all of their problems.

True but people who think like that will quickly learn their lesson and this experience will help them further in life, I'd say its worth for some to make that mistake.

To me its just exchanging one set of problems for another but if you do your research well you can solve more pressing issues in exchange for small annoyances. Later on you might discover different drawbacks but I think its better to take this risk than sit at home all your life and experience nothing.

Aphasiac you must have fresh insight into this matter, do you regret taking that step?

I think you're right, in that no country is perfect - they all have their own issues, some of which are not as obvious but are just as important. For example, here in Taiwan the crime-rate is ultra-low which is great; but I still wouldn't dream of raising my kids here, due to the dangerous roads and the Asian school system (which seems designed to crush individuality and critical thinking).

Likewise, people follow society's rules very strictly - which means you don't the yob culture and idiots you get in Britain - but at same time people are more "sheep"-like, and don't protest or even question the more stupid laws. You're giving up one thing for another.

It's too early to say if I regret moving or not yet; I'm still in the "honeymoon" holiday phase, where everything is new and exciting and that's biasing my overall view of the country. Also not sure if I'm a good example of the person being talked about in the article, as I had no real expectations before coming here; I mainly just moved because of my girlfriend.

Having expectations that your life will dramatically improve will probably lead to huge disappointment, but I do recommend people at least give it a go; for me it's been a really exciting adventure so far.

I think aphasiac is spot on.

I read the article as well the other day (love Cracked) and I see where he is coming from; everybody has already pointed out all the positives so I'll point out only the negatives, but I think it's better (if you're really considering moving abroad) reading something that incorporates both.

I lived abroad twice, both times within Europe, so the culture shock wasn't super great, but what got to me the most was not being able to eat the food I love because it was unavailable or very hard to get. That was the most difficult for me. XD Same thing on my holiday to Japan last year, so hard to find food I actually liked (I really dislike the taste of fish, and since I couldn't read most of the labels it was very difficult to find food that didn't have fish in it. I lost 2 kilos in 3 weeks and I normally never lose or gain weight). So yeah, that would probably be the most major issue for me in terms of culture shock; the food.

Also, culture shock also depends on where you go. If you've always lived in Europe and you move to another European country, culture shock is less great than if you'd move to Asia or South America or something. I think many of those things you can also mentally prepare yourself for, by reading a lot about the culture of the country you're going to or even the area you're going to, and by asking others who have already moved there, especially if they're from the same country you're from.

The guy who wrote the article managed to settle abroad as well, so I the message I take from his article is: it's difficult, but never impossible.

thurd Wrote:

Jarvik7 Wrote:That cracked article is awesome though. Too many people have expectations of foreign country X being a wonderland that will solve all of their problems.

True but people who think like that will quickly learn their lesson and this experience will help them further in life, I'd say its worth for some to make that mistake.

To me its just exchanging one set of problems for another but if you do your research well you can solve more pressing issues in exchange for small annoyances. Later on you might discover different drawbacks but I think its better to take this risk than sit at home all your life and experience nothing.

Aphasiac you must have fresh insight into this matter, do you regret taking that step?

Realize that people like you are the ones that tend to get culture shock way worse because you came in with expectations that will inevitably not hold up. I'm not trying to doom you or anything, but it's very important that you keep an open mind.

erlog Wrote:

thurd Wrote:

Jarvik7 Wrote:That cracked article is awesome though. Too many people have expectations of foreign country X being a wonderland that will solve all of their problems.

True but people who think like that will quickly learn their lesson and this experience will help them further in life, I'd say its worth for some to make that mistake.

To me its just exchanging one set of problems for another but if you do your research well you can solve more pressing issues in exchange for small annoyances. Later on you might discover different drawbacks but I think its better to take this risk than sit at home all your life and experience nothing.

Aphasiac you must have fresh insight into this matter, do you regret taking that step?

Realize that people like you are the ones that tend to get culture shock way worse because you came in with expectations that will inevitably not hold up. I'm not trying to doom you or anything, but it's very important that you keep an open mind.

Are you saying someone moving abroad should expect only trouble and shouldn't expect their troubles to alleviate at all or only very slowly?

I moved abroad twice (Europe -> US, US -> Japan) and it was the best thing I have ever done. Even if it hadn't worked out that well I wouldn't have regretted taking the chance. The experience is well worth it and I think everyone who has the chance should give it a shot.

Every place has its own troubles. I love Japan but if someone forced me to choose a place to settle down for the rest of my life I would choose the US in a heartbeat. It's not that I don't feel comfortable in Japan, I just prefer the problems in the US, especially considering education and raising children (very similar to aphasiac).

I think one of the main problems is that people expect a new country to solve their *personal* problems. If you're fed up with the high crime rate in your home country then yes, moving to Japan will probably solve that. If you're fed up with no good ramen places to go, yes, moving to Japan will make you a bit happier.

However, if you are depressed, lazy / not hardworking, not a social person sitting home watching anime all the time, can't talk to girls or have any other kind of personal issue then expecting a new country to solve any of these is absurd. If you want change in terms of personal life you gotta fix yourself first, no matter where you are. Moving to a new country won't make you any happier.

I agree with you in that anyone who gets the chance should take it.

Even if you come back 'defeated', you will still have experienced something major and you've probably learnt a lot about yourself, even if the things you learnt are just things like: I love my own country more, or: I really suck at meeting new people.

ThomasB Wrote:However, if you are depressed, lazy / not hardworking, not a social person sitting home watching anime all the time, can't talk to girls or have any other kind of personal issue then expecting a new country to solve any of these is absurd. If you want change in terms of personal life you gotta fix yourself first, no matter where you are. Moving to a new country won't make you any happier.

Bingo - the article needs point #7:

"No matter where in the world you go, YOU'RE the same person".

This is one of the biggest issues you see on gaijinpot or forumosa; Lonely nerdy guys come to Asia having heard of how popular white guys are here, and are then surprised and disappointed when they still can't make friends or get dates.

Sure being white in Asia gives you a +3 bonus, which means an average Westerner might suddenly be able to punch above his weight when hitting on cute chicks - but you still have to have the ability to get girls in the first place. If you're socially awkward, you're not going to suddenly be transformed into a social butterfly overnight.

Read the article and found a lot of it jived with my experiences abroad, but I'd say the author comes off as a lot more negative than necessary (unless that's just for comedic effect). For example, I've been to rural areas in Japan and can't recall ever being pointed at or laughed at, just for being a foreigner...though there was the time when this lady almost ran her car into the closest house upon spotting me walking with my parents (maybe she thought my father was a movie star? ).

As for culture shock, the twin brother to that is homesickness, which the author doesn't quite mention directly. No matter how experienced a traveler you are, when you go live somewhere, it can be a heck of a lot more stressful - because you can't say to yourself "just one more week and I'll be home." And even when you think you've settled in, you can suddenly find yourself feeling homesick for no apparent reason.

aphasiac Wrote:"No matter where in the world you go, YOU'RE the same person".

This is true, as far as it goes. If you expect all of your problems to go away just because you've switched scenery, you will probably be sorely disappointed. However, I would add: "It's far easier to change yourself when you're not surrounded by the things you're used to, and when the situation demands that you change." I certainly learned a lot from living abroad, and I'm damned glad I did it.