I just came back to the forums briefly to wish everyone a merry Christmas and ended up catching up on most of the last few months of this thread. Wow . . . I hardly know where to begin, which probably means I shouldn't, but here I go anyway . . .
Igordesu, the church you were part of wasn't the most representative example of Christianity. I hope you look around a bit before rejecting all of Christianity based on one, somewhat extreme, fundamentalist group. Some of the reasons you mentioned for losing your faith are the same reasons that I am no longer Protestant.
I'm sorry to hear that your grandmother died. It sounds like you were very close. You can't hold yourself responsible for the fate of her soul, and I don't think you can know exactly, either. If God is all knowing, then He already knows what a good person your grandmother was, and if He is all powerful and all good, then we can trust this to Him. It's at least possible that all the good you saw your grandmother do -- living the beatitudes -- testified to a faith that she lived but could not or did not express in words.
Here's a little link comparing Protestant and Catholic ideas of salvation: faith alone vs. faith & works. There are lots of pages like this; I just picked this one because it sticks fairly close to scripture references.
http://thiscatholicjourney.com/2006/11/s...works.html This doesn't address the question of the person with good works and no faith, but it's one place to start thinking about that . . . and one other thing to think about regarding your grandmother's situation is the possibility of "anonymous Christians":
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anonymous_Christian
May all of you -- no matter what you think about the holiday -- have joy, peace, love and much kanji knowledge this Christmas.