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There book was also digitalized by the people here in the forum.
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I think phrases like "took the bus" work because we assume "you took a bus which you take often or is assumed to be a specific bus which everyone would take under the same circumstances." Like a sense of familiarity and/or common knowledge. Like we tend to say "Where's the bathroom?" rather than "Where's a bathroom?"
"I took the bus." -- I rode on a bus on a common bus route that most people in this area would know if they used the bus system. "The bus which travels along this bus route."
"I took a bus." -- I rode on the bus that happened to be going the direction I was intending to go. I may or may not be unfamiliar with this bus.
"I'll order a salad." or "I'll order the salad." Either works. "The" sounds like you've decided on salad after thinking about it for a bit, or that the salad in question is something you order often. The reason you would say "a salad" in your own example was because you're giving a random example, and "the dressing" is dressing which we all assume comes with salad as part of common knowledge. It's "on the side" because we all know about dressings being put on sides. Or else it's just such a common phrase that the use of "the" is automatic.
I think "the," when not referring to a specific case, is something that is assumed to be common knowledge or have an assumed familiarity to the speaker.
That's what I think anyway.
It's interesting that something everyone uses everyday without thinking about it can be so complicated to explain.
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I think it's very interesting how different views on grammar can still make sense.
In the first example sentence, one could just as easily say that obaasan and ojiisan are the subjects and that ha is used later to differentiate, "one did this, one did that", which is how I learned the particles.
I guess, as long as it's consistent, to each his own.
Edited: 2009-03-02, 4:53 pm
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I believe it's because none of it's really true, but all of it's functionally true. It's the five blind men describing the elephant.
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Better than how my Korean professor described the Korean equivalent of wa/ga:
Subject & Bigger-Subject