julianjalapeno Wrote:But I meant its depressing for these women who are so kind and intelligent and warm but have such low self-esteem that they've resigned themselves to doing anything men ask of them.

bodhisamaya Wrote:

julianjalapeno Wrote:But I meant its depressing for these women who are so kind and intelligent and warm but have such low self-esteem that they've resigned themselves to doing anything men ask of them.

It is more of an unconscious temporary trade-off for the opportunity to mate with a member of the opposite sex from a vastly different gene pool.

Men don't resign themselves to doing anything women ask in the West? I have dinned at crappy French restaurants wearing uncomfortable clothing listening to stupefying office gossip for hours on end, then paid for the whole miserable experience afterwards. I have also suffered ballet performances, operas, ballroom dancing lessons, on and on... all to satisfy a form of temporary hormonal insanity.

Kuma01 Wrote:I'm starting to get the idea most of you only learned Japanese and moved there in order to get girls, which apparently was much harder for you in your native country.

Hashiriya Wrote:these threads always are about screwing Japanese girls I swear >_< For the record, my wife never has had a problem kissing in public. Everybody is different despite what the Japanese people say about themselves. If every white person was like me, this world would be screwed.

Quote:Before coming here, I was a "fun addict" that makes crazy parties twice a week and would never hesitate to do stupid things in public if asked to do!

Tzadeck Wrote:

Kuma01 Wrote:I'm starting to get the idea most of you only learned Japanese and moved there in order to get girls, which apparently was much harder for you in your native country.

What a boring overused and untrue sentiment.

julianjalapeno Wrote:But I meant its depressing for these women who are so kind and intelligent and warm but have such low self-esteem that they've resigned themselves to doing anything men ask of them.

vix86 Wrote:...I think of someone that likes to talk about any of these things: politics, current news locally/globally, economy, science, technology, philosophy, history, novels/literature, just to name stuff that came to mind immediately...

Oniichan Wrote:

vix86 Wrote:...I think of someone that likes to talk about any of these things: politics, current news locally/globally, economy, science, technology, philosophy, history, novels/literature, just to name stuff that came to mind immediately...

"...and besides all this, she must possess a certain something in her air and manner of walking, the tone of her voice, her address and expressions, or the word will be but half deserved.''

aphasiac Wrote:

fifo_thekid Wrote:not because Japan is the land of opportunities, but, let's say, that I have my ways ).

fifo_thekid Wrote:although our relationship is not supposed to last for more than a couple of year due to our "special circumstances".

From these posts it sounds like you're training to be secret agents or military assassins or something, lol

fifo_thekid Wrote:and a fair amount of permanent, dear friends

This thread i found quite enlightening on that topic - have a read from this post onwards:

http://forum.koohii.com/showthread.php?pid=53047#pid53047

thecite Wrote:So you're on the undergrad scholarship?
Not knowing much Japanese would certainly be an obstacle to having a good time in Japan, but I'm sure you'll manage. You've only been there a few months and already have a girlfriend. 手が早いじゃん（笑）

julianjalapeno Wrote:I`ve lived in Japan for four years total now (come next week), and let me tell you, its a bit of a nightmare. On the way to work everyday I have to bat off waves of comely lasses that want just a taste of my gaijin flavor, and if I survive this daily onslaught, I have to deal with more of the same at work. My Japanese male co-workers are far too busy with working 20-hour shifts to notice me bogarting all of the fresh trim, so theyre of little help.

Seriously though, the infamous attraction Japanese women seem to have for foreigners thats been mentioned in this thread has less to do with how great we are and more to do with the emotional unavailability of Japanese men. Combine that distance with low self-esteem, a culture that doesnt think much of women being independent and single past their 20s, and a desire to please male figures, and you get a bunch of Japanese women desperate for affection. I feel bad for these women because they have a hard time saying no which leads to them getting their hearts broken when they sleep with a guy on the first date and he moves on to the next.

I went out with a girl here once who told me `We have a saying in Japan. Korean girls in two weeks. Chinese girls in a week. Japanese girls in a day.` I had no idea how to reply to that, but it was depressing to hear.

So if youre having a hard time in your home country, know that there is a Japanese woman somewhere who will have you.

Back to the topic, living in Japan is fun, I think I`ll stay.

julianjalapeno Wrote:Well, as a matter of fact, you can guess what happened.

But I meant its depressing for these women who are so kind and intelligent and warm but have such low self-esteem that they've resigned themselves to doing anything men ask of them.

I think I'm derailing this thread again, but I am kind of confused as to what the OP is asking. Being "satisfied here forever" is impossible to know since we change so much through our lives. What is fun to you now will probably be not as fun 20 years from now. If you like to go out to bars and clubs, the big cities in Japan will probably be alright for a while.

I'm a nerd and a hermit, so I do nothing of the sort. Tokyo fills my needs just fine with ample arcades and used book stores. I'll be moving in with my girlfriend of a few years now in the spring of next year and don't plan on leaving Japan any time soon. So for me, Japan is plenty fun.

I could do without the constant earthquakes tho.

julianjalapeno Wrote:I've met plenty of intelligent women in Japan. The one I mentioned that said the self-deprecating line about Japanese women being easy was a published author and she was only 22 at the time.

There are plenty of vain and shallow women in Japan, but limiting intelligence to nerdy textbook subjects is ridiculous, IMO.

But then again, I don't give a damn about politics so maybe I'm just a retard.

Quote:in·tel·li·gence
–noun
1.
capacity for learning, reasoning, understanding, and similar forms of mental activity; aptitude in grasping truths, relationships, facts, meanings, etc.
2.
manifestation of a high mental capacity: He writes with intelligence and wit.
3.
the faculty of understanding.

Kuma01 Wrote:I'm starting to get the idea most of you only learned Japanese and moved there in order to get girls, which apparently was much harder for you in your native country. I'd chalk it up to the 'exotic' factor, which seems silly because it's hard for me to think of anyone of Western-European descent as exotic. After reading this thread though I'm sort of surprised, well I knew Japanese men were more traditional in some areas, but I assumed the position of modern women in Japan was much the same as in the West. Although it's slowly becoming less about equality and more about postive discrimination here, which is equally undesirable. Anyway I'm wondering if anyone can tell me if it's really true that in Japan your job is the center of your life, and that you're expected to fullfill a lot more company related social obligations than in the West.

fifo_thekid Wrote:

thecite Wrote:So you're on the undergrad scholarship?
Not knowing much Japanese would certainly be an obstacle to having a good time in Japan, but I'm sure you'll manage. You've only been there a few months and already have a girlfriend. 手が早いじゃん（笑）

I'm on a 1year researcher scholarship, then 2 years Master's scholarship
After that I'm planning to extend to Phd

fifo_thekid Wrote:What if I'm very good in the research field?
Do I still have to work more than 8 hours a day?

vosmiura Wrote:I generally hear from friends living or have lived in Tokyo that they love living in Tokyo, but they don't like the work life. Like aphasiac said, you have to stay and pretend to work late all the time. This eats into how much time you get to enjoy living in Japan, and being with your family. Also generally you have to accept that you have almost no career growth opportunity.